Nikki the ringer

Big Brother sends code monkey to sleep

As the big brother contestants gasp on the stagnant air of a dying format we can only pray that the oxygen of publicity is turned off together with the lights of the BB house. That a cast consisting of an octogenarian stripper, a wannabe Sloan ranger (you ever are or your not, Grace your not), an obnoxiously camp Canadian, a simpering home girl, a Scouse so wet and wooden you suspect the producers just dragged some sodden drift wood out of the Mersey, a woman so dull that her mere presence on screen induces a catatonic state so deep that the populace accept John Prescott as the deputy prime minister for the summer and who's only asset seems to be an upper torso that has been engineered with such precision that conventional maths struggles with the required equations. And that's before we even get to the over exposed sartorial ditherings of Russell Brand and the imbecilic braying of that woman Davina McCall. Now I know what you're going to say, "change the channel, even better, turn your TV off, after all that's what the remote is for".

Yes, but then how would I get to sleep at night? And worse still I would have missed classics from Glynn such as the time he expressed his concern about being (and I quote) "ejaculated from the house". [Shortly after, his hormones got the better of him and he climbed the wall to spy on the octogenarian stripper in "the house next door".] Finally, and let's be honest here, Nikki's water shows are some of the best in the world: [drinking water from the bathroom tap] "I can't be a***d going to the kitchen but if I gag and feel sick after drinking this I'm calling the police" [or words to that effect]. OK it's not that funny, but the subsequent ten minutes Nikki the ringer spends squirming around on the floor acting her little socks off is some of the best TV I've seen recently. (No I don't watch much TV...perhaps I should broaden my range of viewing.)

Apart from Big Brother what else is happening? Well, Autumn seems to have come early to Aberdeen, that is: it's cold again. The highland games are in full swing (spotted at the Ballater games last week - Gavin Hastings, ex-Scotland rugby international, being ignored by several thousand people apart from Pete who said "look, it's Gavin Hastings".) I'm currently working on an update to our customer software due out in the next week or two. New features will include the ability for you to choose the look and feel of terramar.co.uk. Ahhh, personalised shopping, and online too!

The lack of blog entries over the last month and a bit are largely down to all my code monkeying, for that is me a code monkey.

Finally, a (belated) happy birthday to Lil.


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